Movie Quote of the Week

You know you've reached rock bottom when you're told you have character flaws by a man who hanged his predecessor in a military coup.
--Tom Hanks, Charlie Wilson's War (2007)

Learn, Larry, Learn

There are many things I could say about the 2011 movie Larry Crowne but the one idea that keeps coming to mind is that it was meant to be sort of an anti-Crash. Instead of giving the movie-going public yet another scenario a la the 2005 movie Crash in which people of varying races and ethnicities spent most of their time symbolically tearing each other apart, Larry Crowne gave us a scenario in which the same variety of people came together to accomplish a common goal. In this case, the goal was the intellectual enabling of recently unemployed store clerk Larry Crowne.

What made Larry Crowne so special? The movie never really said though I imagine it has something to do with the fact that he was both a nice guy and a character played by Tom Hanks. A more sophisticated analysis was downplayed by a screenplay that found more pleasure in a running gag involving confiscated cell phones than in any serious social commentary.

For the record, the movie deserved some credit for inspiring my little sister to think seriously about going back to school like the title character did. However apart from that, the best thing I could say about the film is that it never promised to be more than a pleasant way to spend two hours enjoying the local movie theatre's air conditioning and on that one point, it most definitely delivered.

Twenty “Worst” Chick Flicks

Yet another idea “borrowed” from Byzantium's Shores: a list of the alleged twenty worst “chick flicks” of the last twenty years and my thoughts on the same:

20. Autumn in New York.

I haven't seen it.

19. The English Patient.

I haven't seen it.

18. Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood.

I haven't seen it.

17. The Notebook.

I actually did see this. I'm not going to pretend I liked it (after all, the main plot twist is given away in the trailer) but I was more moved by James Garner's performance than I expected to be. So I can't say I hated it either.

16. Dr. T and the Women.

I haven't seen it.

15. Sweet November.

I haven't seen it.

14. You've Got Mail.

The only good thing about this movie was the soundtrack album and the fact that it inspired me to rent from the local library a copy of the 1940 original The Shop Around the Corner. Then, of course, there's the fact that the plot of this movie just doesn't work as well as the plot of the original. After all, Jimmy Stewart didn't scheme to eliminate the store that was his would-be girlfriend's livelihood. And Nora Ephron never quite convinces me that it was a good idea for Meg Ryan to forgive Tom Hanks for doing just that. And as much as I loved The Godfather, I could not help but find Ephron's “all men quote The Godfather” routine to be forced and unconvincing.

13. The Princes of Tides.

I haven't seen it.

12. Georgia Rule.

Mi last ex-novia talked me into seeing this but I fell asleep halfway through the movie. What little I saw didn't exactly inspire me to stay awake.

11. Crossroads.

I haven't seen it.

10. The Bridges of Madison County.

I did see it. I was bored to tears. But at least I got a lot of chances to look at my watch.

9. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.

I haven't seen it.

8. Fried Green Tomatoes.

I haven't seen it.

7. How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days.

I haven't seen it.

6. Beaches.

One of my former novias was into the theme song for this movie. But I wasn't. Perhaps because -- you guessed it -- I haven't seen it.

5. Sleepless in Seattle.

I actually liked this movie, though I suspect it was more due to the Jimmy Durante song that played during the opening credits than its not-so-imaginative take on romance. At least I remember liking it more than You've Got Mail -- not that's saying a lot.

4. Dirty Dancing.

I liked it fair enough, but I never loved it the way some people seem to do. I liked the soundtrack fair enough, though I'm fairly sick of hearing The Contours' song “Do Ya Love Me” thanks to this movie.

3. Steel Magnolias.

I haven't seen it. Yes, I know. I should be ashamed.

2. Ghost.

It was okay. My sister liked it more than me. In fact, she cried at the end. I'll admit to liking it better than Jacob's Ladder, which was written by the same guy. But I didn't like it the way my sister liked it.

1. Titanic.

My middle brother once told my mother that as much as he liked this movie, he was certain that she was going to love it. He was right. I liked it well enough, but not as much as other people. And the whole Rose Dawson exposing herself -- er -- posing in the nude for the man she loved seemed like such a male-oriented fantasy that I'm still surprised that so many women take this film seriously. It's not quite deserving of the backlash against it, but then it's not quite deserving of the endless worship which prompted the backlash.

All the Things That I Have Seen

1. P.S. I Love You (2007).

It seems like a sick joke to admit this but this was the last romantic movie mi ex-novia and I saw together. It wasn't really a comedy because there were a lot of things that happened in this movie that weren't really funny. But it was better than I expected, and I'm kinda glad I let mi ex-novia talk me into seeing it.

The movie was about a woman (played by Hilary Swank) who lost her husband to cancer and spent the rest of the movie trying to come to terms with his death. Along the way, she started getting letters that were written by her deceased spouse prior to his death. The letters encouraged her to do things that will help her adjust to life without him.

Did they work?

See the movie and decide for yourself. And yes, the storyline makes it seem like a remake of Catch and Release, but it's still worth seeing even if you're the type of person who didn't like Catch and Release. (For what it's worth, I was kinda luke-warm about Catch and Release but I enjoyed this film -- if enjoy is the proper term to use in regard to a movie about death -- a lot more.)

2. Charlie Wilson's War (2007).

The type of film that makes you really, really want to hate the Russians. Yet it's obviously more ambitious than the usual death-to-the-Commies thriller.

It's tempting to call this movie Afghan Invasion for Dummies because it seems obvious from the first frame that the film isn't exactly aimed at the type of people who would buy tickets to see The Kite Runner.

But in its own way, it manages to work, even if it seems far more comfortable with its protagonist's Clintonian activities (drinking, womanizing, etc.) than it does with the more serious political implications of its storyline.