¡Adios, 2018!

I hope there's nothing too serious to worry about in the future.

In any event, here's wishing the best to all of my loyal readers in 2018. I know I have not been posting as regularly this past year as much as you all might like but I really am trying to improve on that. May you all have a safe celebration tonight.

Trailer of the Week: Mary Poppins Returns

Mary Poppins is back! And she looks remarkably like the Angel of Verdun. Plus she has Lin-Manuel Miranda as a co-star. I wonder what he's done lately...

Movie Quote of the Week

They can be a great people, Kal-El, they wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all, their capacity for good, I have sent them you... my only son.
--Marlon Brando, Superman (1978)

TV Quote of the Week

All over the world they celebrate the birth of that baby, and everybody gets time off from work. Now if that ain't proof that he's the Son of God, then nothing is.
--Carroll O'Connor, All in the Family, "Christmas Day at the Bunkers'"

Pop Song of the Week: "The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down"

Joan Baez, Confederate apologist.

Movie Song of the Week: "Hollywood Ending"

It's High School Musical meets Buffy the Vampi -- er -- Zombie Slayer in a little musical number from the new movie Anna and the Apocalypse that seems deliberately designed to make me wonder if I owe Tim Burton an apology for not being more enthusiastic about his musical collaborations with Danny Elfman. For that matter, I can't help wondering if I owe Joss Whedon an apology too.

Perhaps Geena Davis said it best: Be afraid. Be very afraid.

After all, if this musical is successful, we might see many more like it.

Words of the Present III

1. acerebral -- without a brain.
2. allophilia -- a positive attitude for a group that is not one's own.
3. antipolonism -- a spectrum of hostile attitudes toward Polish people and culture.
4. apocalypse fatigue -- reduced interest in current or potential environmental problems due to frequent dire warnings about those problems.
5. bikini medicine -- medical practice, research, and funding that focuses solely on the female breasts and reproductive system.
6. bozo explosion -- the large number of inept employees that a company ends up with when it hires an incompetent executive, who in turn hires incompetent managers, who then hire incompetent workers.
7. digital immigrants -- people who started to use the Internet and other digital technology as adults.
8. digital natives -- people who grew up with the Internet and other digital technology.
9. diversity fatigue -- a form of mental exhaustion brought on by the constant attention required to ensure a workforce or other group is racially or ethnically diverse.
10. emporiophobia -- fear or mistrust of, or resistance to, free markets.
11. entropy tourism -- travel that features places of decay, neglect, or abandonment.
12. gallery rage -- extreme anger displayed by an art gallery patron when a visit is marred by huge crowds or rude gallery staff.
13. hecatine -- relating to Hecate.
14. heteroclite -- a nonconformist; a person who is not conventional.
15. hydropot -- a water drinker.
16. hypergraphia -- a behavioral condition characterized by the intense desire to write.
17. informavore -- a person who consumes information.
18. laptop zombie -- a laptop user in a public place who is oblivious to everyone and everything except the screen in front of them.
19. librarian chic -- a fashion style that uses elements of, or is inspired by, the styles stereotypically attributed to librarians.
20. mammogenic -- promoting growth of the milk glands.
21. natation -- swimming.
22. necrologue -- obituary.
23. nightpiece -- work of art describing a night scene.
24. noctivagant -- wandering in the night.
25. notonectal -- swimming on the back.
26. nyctograph -- device for recording ideas at night or when not fully awake.
27. nymphology -- study of nymphs.
28. pancake people -- Internet users who read widely, but without depth.
29. panivorous -- bread-eating.
30. popcorn movie -- a motion picture without serious dramatic content, a weighty message, or intellectual depth, which serves simply as enjoyable entertainment.
31. procerity -- tallness; height.
32. proletarian drift -- the tendency for originally upscale products to eventually become popular with the working class or proles.
33. racial battle fatigue -- stress and anxiety caused by constantly dealing with both overtly racist actions and subtle references to one’s race.
34. rainbow ceiling -- business practices and prejudices that create an unseen and unofficial barrier to personal advancement for gay employees.
35. ravenette -- someone with black hair.
36. resistance fatigue -- mental exhaustion brought on by the constant protesting of unpopular government policies.
37. retrophilia -- an intense attraction for things of the past.
38. retrosexual -- a man with an undeveloped aesthetic sense who spends as little time and money as possible on his appearance and lifestyle.
39. rhino -- older man in search of a younger woman.
40. ruin porn aka ruins photography -- a recent movement in photography that takes the decline of the built-environment (cities, buildings, infrastructure) as its subject.
41. rustalgia -- nostalgia for the lost world of the American Rust Belt.
42. Sadian -- one who spends his life studying the Marquis de Sade.
43. Tankie -- Stalinist; one who favored the use of tanks in putting down rebellions in Communist regimes.
44. time confetti -- brief pieces of leisure time scattered throughout a person‘s day.
45. transliteracy -- the ability to read and write using multiple media, including traditional print media, electronic devices, and online tools.
46. Turtledove effect -- in a work of alternate history, the implausible insertion of characters or events from the original timeline.
47. vapulation -- flogging.
48. virtue signalling -- using words, actions, or symbols to indicate to other people that you are a good person or that you hold certain moral values.
49. xenocentrism -- the preference for the products, styles, or ideas of someone else's culture rather than of one's own.
50. zombie lie -- a false statement that keeps getting repeated no matter how often it has been refuted.

My Mother's Still Sick

But she's getting better. Seriously.

I, on the other hand, have been forced to take at least a week off from work due to medical issues. Hopefully, I can return to work soon.

And You All Thought Hill House Was A Bad Place: Crimson Peak

It's tempting to call Crimson Peak a classic example of splatterpunk gothic but that would probably create the impression that the movie was a lot gorier than it actually was.

As it is, the movie was a lot gorier than the typical gothic movies that I remember seeing when I was growing up but it still had plenty of old-fashioned horror thrills as well as a plot twist that I certainly did not see coming. If nothing else, it was hard to hate a movie that managed to work in allusions to both Jane Austen and Mary Shelley in its dialogue and it didn't hurt that the heroine Edith Cushing* (who was played by actress Mia Wasikowska) was smarter than your average damsel in distress.

If all of Guillermo del Toro's movies were this good, I'd be a lot more optimistic about his future projects.

* An obvious reference to that Cushing!

Was This Movie Really Necessary?: Guardians of the Galaxy 2

Most decent movie sequels make me feel bad if I never got a chance to see the first movie in the series. This isn't one of them.

It managed to take almost every element of a successful comic book movie and make it annoying. Then it had the nerve to wrap everything up with a shamelessly contrived -- and not quite believable -- pro-family message. Even the presence of Karen Gillan of Doctor Who fame and the obligatory rip-off -- er -- homage to Hitchcock's North by Northwest couldn't save this film from being amazingly unwatchable. Any indication that it might prove otherwise was dashed to pieces by the opening sequence which managed to make what could have been an exciting action piece seem dull -- and don't get me started on the merits of any casting director who would have Michelle Yeoh play second fiddle to the likes of Chris Pratt. Add to that dialogue that made the Three Stooges sound like refugees from the Algonquin Round Table and you had one real stinker of a movie.

And if you're tempted to watch it because of the talking raccoon, go rent Over the Hedge. It's a lot more funnier and more entertaining and it won't make you feel like a sucker for watching it.

¡Feliz Navidad!

Ms. Dolores del Río wants to wish all my readers a Merry Christmas this year.

May all of you enjoy a particularly blessed season this year.

Pop Song of the Week: "The Passenger"

Someone hinted on another site that I was a necromancer because of my tendency to "resurrect" old discussion threads and between that and my rather obvious affection for site like For the Gothic Heroine, I obviously have more than a few Gothic tendencies. Or at least as many as one would expect from someone of my age and ethnic background. So why not play this song by Siouxsie and the Banshees? it's not exactly a Christmas song but in my mind, it could be.

Besides, could you think of any song lyrics that capture the spirit of Christmas shopping in the age of Trump better than "la la la la la-la-la la! La la la la la-la-la la! La la la la la-la-la la la-la!"?

Movie Song of the Week: "Welcome to Burlesque"

I never thought to associate this song with ice skating until a few weeks ago when I heard it used as background music for one of the recent ice skating competitions that my mother was watching on TV. Indeed, I'm a bit embarrassed that I didn't recognize the tune immediately though it has been a long while since I've seen the 2010 movie Burlesque from which it comes. Oh, well. Even mediocre Cher is more memorable than most singers who aren't Cher and I think it's a bit of a kick to see her go all toast of Mayfair on the audience in this number. I hope you all enjoy it.

And Now My Mother is Sick...

But on the bright side, she is getting better. She still has a bit of a sore throat and a cough but she sounds better today than she did yesterday. Seriously.

Movie Quote of the Week

Fixed fortifications are monuments to the stupidity of man. If mountain ranges and oceans can be overcome, then anything built by man can be overcome.
--George C. Scott, Patton (1970)

TV Quote of the Week

At least it's only on the Internet. It's not somewhere important like a newspaper or a shopping bag.
--Constance Wu, Fresh Off the Boat, "Phil's Phaves"

A Series of Dickensian Events

It's the 175th anniversary of Charles Dickens' famous novella A Christmas Carol so naturally it seems the ideal time to review two of the most recent movies to be inspired by that classic tale.

First off there's Robert Zemeckis's 2009 animated film A Christmas Carol, which basically stars Jim Carrey in a multitude of roles (including the starring role of Ebenezer Scrooge). As far as Dickensian remakes go, I've seen better and I've seen worse. (I'm looking at you, An American Carol, when I say "worse", by the way.) For the most part, I found it relatively pain-free as long as it stuck to the original dialogue of the Dickens book. However, the moment Zemeckis tried to improve on it, the results were not that great. (For example, did we really need to see a mouse-sized Scrooge?)

On the plus side, the animation was good -- though surprisingly bright for what after all is a Christmas ghost story to end all Christmas ghost stories. And it didn't hurt that Zemeckis's version was one of the few versions of A Christmas Carol I can remember that mentioned both Scrooge's sister Fan and his ex-girlfriend Belle. (Granted, Dickens himself didn't give them much space in the original book but all too many versions of A Christmas Carol leave them out altogether.)

Much of the movie was predictable -- and not just because it was based on a book almost everyone had to read in school. (For example, anyone not acquainted with the novel who couldn't guess the obvious connection between the fate of Scrooge's only sibling and his dislike of his sole nephew either hadn't seen a lot of movies or else wasn't really trying.) Moreover, online complaints about how dark the movie was for a children's movie seemed odd to me, if for no other reason that the various versions of A Christmas Carol that I've seen over the years -- most of which were aimed at children as well -- have always been dark. And I first became acquainted with this story when I was still in grade school.

That said, I can think of many animated versions of A Christmas Carol that I like far better -- though I will give Zemeckis and Carrey credit for giving us the first version I've ever seen in which the Ghost of Christmas Past spoke with an Irish accent.

I'm not sure how literally to take the title of the 2017 movie The Man Who Invented Christmas and it's probably just as well I didn't. Like all too many movies based on the lives of famous people, this movie was perhaps best viewed as alternative history.

If screenwriter Susan Coyne and director Bharat Nalluri had anything original to say about Dickens and his famous novella, it certainly didn't show up on screen. But what they did put up there proved to be watchable as long as you don't mistake it for a documentary.

Part of the problem with the movie was that anyone who knew enough about Dickens to get more than half the jokes also knew enough to predict the ending -- including the obligatory surprise plot twist. Moreover, some characters seemed more contrived than others. Granted, I still have a soft spot for Tara the Imaginary Irish Maid whose obvious purpose was to inspire Dickens to write his famous novella and give him advice along the way to its completion -- no doubt playing her part in the old Irish literary tradition of inspiring other writers. But I would have liked it better if she had not seemed to be such an obviously fictional character.

Oh, well. They obviously didn't make this movie for me. But in the wake of Great Depression II, it would have been nice if they had made it for someone who wasn't nostalgic for the days of good old Queen Vic.

Hey, I Remember This Show: Aquaman (1967)

Wow! Aquaman has certainly changed over the years. This is the first show I remember seeing him on -- and it's still hard to get used to the fact that he doesn't look like that anymore.

Hey, I Don't Remember This Show: Aquaman (2006)

Remember that hit show about Aquaman that used to be shown on the CW channel? Neither do I. And no wonder. This show lasted for only one episode.

If nothing else, the casting is a bit unusual. Lou Diamond Phillips is Aquaman's stepdad, Ving Rhames is a fellow Atlantean, Denise Quiñones is an Air Force pilot -- and one female character in the intro doesn't even get her name mentioned in the opening credits. What's up with that?

Quote of the Week

In a poem pamphlet by Sophie Mayer called TV GIRLS, full of poems about contemporary TV heroines, Mayer lists the weapons that Buffy the Vampire Slayer uses through the show's seven TV seasons to keep the vampires, demons and various forces of evil at bay. On her list, in among the stakes and swords and sunlight, is "library card".
--Ali Smith, "the ideal model of society"

So Much for Wise Men: Three Kings

History has not been too kind to this flick. Although it was no doubt originally meant as a subtle attempt to encourage American military involvement in the Balkans back in the late 1990s, this film seems like a sick joke if you interpret it as an equally sincere plea to go back into Iraq and finish what the first Gulf War started. No doubt director David O. Russell and company meant well, but thanks to the Second Gulf War, their good intentions seem kinda questionable nowadays.

Besides, you know what they say about where good intentions lead -- and what kind of roads use them as paving stones.

Pensamientos Acerca de Televisión

Doctor Who (The Second Series): “The Tsuranga Conundrum”

If “Kill the Moon” was supposed to be Doctor Who's idea of a pro-life story, this episode is their version of a -- what? -- pro-choice episode? The little alien who threatens to eat everything did seem like an apt metaphor for the way little babies sometimes are. But surely that's just a coincidence, right?

Pensamientos Acerca de Televisión

NCIS: New Orleans: “Tick Tock”

So now the Angel of Death is a regular character on this show? She's been on three episodes so far this season -- including this one. I don't suppose the writers are trying to tell us something...

Christmas Song of the Week: "Last Christmas"

This week I post yet another selection from our good friends at Postmodern Jukebox. And this time it's a Christmas song. With tap dancing. Yay!

Movie Quote of the Week

Principles only mean something when you stick to them when it's inconvenient.
--Joan Allen, The Contender (2000)

TV Quote of the Week

It's easy to be nice to people you like. But being nice to people you hate, that's a skill. Do it.
--Robert Sean Leonard, House M.D., “The Tyrant”

Holiday Horror Movie Idea

Question asked on another site:

If we can't get a cheesy Chanukah horror movie, how about a cheesy Christmas one where the Final Girl is Jewish and missed the first attack because she wasn't at the Christmas party?
--Mira, For the Gothic Heroine

Hey, I would buy a ticket to see that movie.

More details on that movie idea to be found here.

This Just In...

Scientists say that two wolves are scheduled to devour the sun some time this week and that it's all our fault for doing nothing to stop global lupine change. Details at eleven.

And Now My Neck!

The last thing I wanted to do this month was go see a doctor but my neck started to act up so badly at work this past week that I had no choice. The doctor's assistant* looked me over and found no cause for alarm. But she did prescribe some pills and a muscle relaxing cream as well as a list of exercises for me to do in my spare time to build up my neck muscles. I also use a heating pad on my neck but so far the relief from neck pain has only been temporary. If I work long enough, it comes back.

If this keeps up, I may need to see a physical therapist. We'll see.

* Also a doctor, natch.

His Aim Was Not So True: Gotcha!

A lot of your reaction to the 1985 movie Gotcha! will depend a lot on your gender, your age and your sexual orientation. For example, if you're a heterosexual male, you'll probably like it more than most movie goers and even then, your appreciation will depend a lot upon you're young enough to see Linda Fiorentino's character in this movie as a glamorous older woman or whether you're old enough to see her as a cute young thing. Needless to say, the younger males will probably like it better than the older, if for no other reason than they're likely to be more patient with the movie's shameless bouts of "ugly Americanism."

On the plus side, it was one of the few films I've seen in which Chicano bikers proved to be on the hero's side. But then you got that weird fetish scene at the end of the movie in which we the audience were supposed to admire the hero's willingness to shoot a pretty lady in the butt. Then again, it's nice to see that Linda Fiorentino has since gone on to bigger and better roles. Come to think of it, leading man Anthony Edwards has since done pretty well for himself as well but for some strange reason, I don't care that much about what happened to him.

Quote of the Week

I don't use drugs myself. I was too straight to try them in high school, and by the time I moved into a co-op in college where housemates displayed their bongs on their windowsills, I suffered delusions of running for political office someday. (That's the Clinton administration for you.) A cousin had also succumbed to addiction, and I'd seen the toll it had taken on her family. What truly turned me off drugs, however, was dating a Colombian whose parents paid hefty bribes to dissuade cartels from turning their coffee plantation into a coca farm. After traveling to southern Colombia with him and witnessing the destruction that U.S. drug use had wreaked on a more global scale, I became one of those vitriolic Chicanas who, if offered a joint, will snap, "Sorry, I don't smoke the ashes of my people."
--Stephanie Elizondo Griest, All the Agents and Saints: Dispatches from the U.S. Borderlands

¡Feliz Cumpleaños, Mi Hermano y Mi Mamá!

It's that day again.

It's my mother's birthday and my youngest brother's birthday.

It is also the Catholic religious holiday known as Feast of the Immaculate Conception but you all probably knew that already.

Pop Song of the Week: "I Don't Like Mondays"

The one song that Bob Geldof of Live Aid fame would rather you all forget.

Movie Song of the Week: "America"

The more I hear various political officials claim to be part of the "Resistance", the more I want to repost this song.

After all, it can be argued that in his own way, Bernardo was a resistance leader and in any event, any serious discussion of "resistance" that leaves out Hispanics doesn't seem worth talking about.

Cuento de Mi Id

"It's a Wonderful Life: An Alternative Ending"

That night, after a long day of breaking rocks and cursing Uncle Billy, George Bailey lay on his prison bunk and dreamt of libraries.

And librarians.

And hydrangea bushes.

But mostly of libraries, thanks to that damned Hays code.

Pensamientos Acerca de Televisión

Doctor Who (The Second Series): “Arachnids in the UK”

In this latest episode, Yaz, Graham, Ryan and the Doctor leapt out of the rabbit, catching the French by surprise -- not only by surprise but totally unarmed.

Oh, wait. That must be another episode.

In this one, all they did was investigate an epidemic of giant spiders. And deal with an English bigwig who looked and acted like a certain American politician we all know and -- er -- I'm not sure love is the right word to use here.

On the plus side, the name "Team Tardis" had a nice ring to it. Too bad they don't use it more often.

Pensamientos Acerca de Televisión

Doctor Who (The Second Series): “Rosa”

Yes, I get that Rosa Parks was a very famous person and she justly deserves to have her story told and retold. But I can't help but find it a tad amusing that this show's writers assume that the average TV viewer will think of only one person whenever they mention the name "Rosa." After all, Rosa is a popular name among Hispanics even if it's not so popular with Britons.

Oh, well. There were worse things to worry about in this episode -- one of them being the bizarre philosophical questions raised by this episode. After all, the episode's premise revolved around the idea that an alien time traveler was trying to interfere with the American civil rights era by seeing to it that Rosa Parks' famous protest never happened. So the Doctor and her friends were put in the position of -- what? -- making sure Rosa Parks had something to protest about? There was something not quite kosher about that scenario.

I just hope that this doesn't become a trend. I'd hate to tune in each week to see the Doctor and her friends do their damnedest to make sure that a depressing episode of man's cruelty to man goes ahead right on schedule.

Pensamientos Acerca de Televisión

Doctor Who (The Second Series): “The Ghost Monument”

It's The Amazing Race: Outer Space Edition in which two aliens from different worlds compete to win an almost impossible challenge with the help of the Doctor and her friends. Along the way, the Doctor teaches the two aliens the virtues of cooperation and the aliens teach the Doctor -- well, actually I'm not sure about that part. I may have to watch this episode again some time.

Pensamientos Acerca de Televisión

Last Man Standing: "Pilot"

I was never the biggest fan of Tim Allen in the past and now that I've had a chance to see more than a few episodes of his latest show... I still am not a fan.

But now that The Middle is officially over, Last Man Standing is one of the few sitcoms on prime-time TV that comes even close to having a conservative point-of-view. Unfortunately, it is not as well-written as The Middle. Nor is its main star -- the above-mentioned Mr. Allen -- as generous with the spotlight as his counterpart on The Middle, actress Patricia Heaton.(Ms. Heaton was smart enough to let the rest of her cast -- particularly the actors who played her kids -- have the lion's share of the laughs and the sympathy while Mr. Allen insisted on hogging almost all the good jokes -- and all too many bad ones -- for himself). This is not to say that there aren't parts of the show that are actually watchable (especially the parts featuring actress Nancy Travis, who plays the thankless role of Tim's wife) -- but I keep getting the feeling that the show would be a lot funnier if Mr. Allen would just get out of the way.

Oh, well. The show managed to last six seasons without my support -- and it recently began its seventh season on another network. So obviously someone out there likes it.

Pensamientos Acerca de Televisión

Night Gallery: "The Boy Who Predicted Earthquakes"

It's no big secret that director Steven Spielberg originally got his start directing TV show episodes and made-for-TV movies but I often forget that director John Badham -- best known for such iconic movies as Saturday Night Fever and WarGames -- got his start in the same way as well.

One of his more famous TV episodes was a certain memorable episode of Night Gallery that creeped me out the first time I saw it. It's based on one of the few screenplays by Rod Serling that actually attempted to argue that ignorance was bliss, a screenplay which in turn was inspired by a short story by Margaret St. Clair.

The episode was about a boy (played by Clint Howard) who literally predicted events like earthquakes and who ended up getting his own TV show as a result. But alas, complications set in and the boy decided he didn't want to do predictions anymore. When he was persuaded to do one anyway, he gives the TV audience a prophecy so offbeat that it just had to be false. And as you might guess, there turned out to be a reason why that was so...

There is not much else to say about this episode apart from noting that you may not want to think too much about this episode before you go to bed lest you have nightmares. If nothing else, you could always consider this episode to be the ultimate comment on global climate change...

Christmas Song of the Week: "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch"

Violinist Lindsey Stirling and singer Sabrina Carpenter fiddle around with a classic Christmas song.

R.I.P. George Herbert Walker Bush

George Herbert Walker Bush -- former President of the United States and father of former President George W. Bush -- left to join his late wife Barbara on November 30, 2018, at age 94.

He will be missed.

R.I.P. Barbara Bush

Barbara Bush -- wife of former President George H. W. Bush and mother of former President George W. Bush -- retired from her duties on April 17, 2018, at age 92.

She will be missed.