The Americana Paradox

An older relative used to lecture me on how he preferred the women of his native Mexico to American women because they weren't not as used to feminism as American women. And yet he always tended to lean toward the Mexican women who were most assertive and independent -- in other words, he preferred the type of Mexican women who were most like American women. And even when he tried to choose more docile types, his relationships still failed -- probably for the same reasons his relationships with American women failed.

I had a similar revelation when I dated my first girlfriend -- a woman born and raised in Mexico. On one hand, she was prettier than any American woman I had ever talked to and initially we hit it off just fine. But I could not but help but notice that the traits I most admired in her were the traits that were usually associated with Americans. In other words, the things that most attracted me to this foreign-born woman were the same things I could find in most American women. Apart from her ability to pronounce my Spanish first name correctly -- which is hardly much of a basis for a relationship.

Anyway, in the end, our relationship failed. And so did my relationship with the next Mexican woman I courted.

Indeed, I still find it ironic that after years of dreaming about finding the ideal Latina woman to be mi novia, the strongest romantic relationship I've had to date with has been with a woman who is not Hispanic. Perhaps the Powers That Be are trying to tell me something.